Monday, June 15, 2009
We had a kind of rough weekend, capped off with a totally sad morning today.
Poor doggie, I took her this morning to the vet to be put to sleep.
She had not eaten for the last week and has lost almost half her body weight. The last three days, she has barely been able to get up off the floor, and has thrown up almost every time she gets up. She was unable to even keep water down anymore the last two nights. So last night we put up some baracades to the kitchen to keep her in there because even though she is weak she still tries to come upstairs to lie by our bed at night. This time, she didn’t even lift her head up off the floor. Her poor bony ribs are sticking out, and you can see them, and she wont hardly look us in the face. So sad how quickly she progressed from pretty good, to downright debilitated.
So this morning, I got up and went downstairs (knowing we were going to take her) and I laid beside her on the floor and talked with her. (I know…like Marley and Me. ) I thought it was kind of silly, but I wanted to give her some love. Then I woke the girls up to talk with her before I took her at 8:30. They came down, sat with her. Jyllie made her a card and asked me to put it in her grave with her (at the dr. office, which I didnt have the heart to explain to her)
The card said.
Dear Disco, you are my favorite dog. I hope you are my only dog. You are #1 and there is no other dog like you. I hope you have a good time in heaven. Jesus is nice. I love you forever and ever. Love Jyllian.
And she drew a picture of her and Disco together.
I read it to the dog while the girls pet her, both of them crying.
Then Jada helped me carry her on a ‘stretcher’ to the car. They stayed home while I drove up there.
I’m not typically a gushy person. I love dogs, but I feel like they are …dogs and when the time comes, it’s time. I've even been a vet tech and helped put many dogs to sleep before. I'm very no nonsense about it, so I didnt think this would be so bad. I even kind of felt sad that I couldn’t muster up a tear on the way there.
But I did talk to her, and sang Jesus loves the Little Doggies (seriously) to her on the way. When we got there, I went inside and asked if one of the nurses would come help me.
When I went to open the tailgate to the car…and saw her, I BURST into tears sobbing away, and I didn’t stop until I left the office. I cried bringing her in, setting her on the floor of the office, holding her head as she slipped to sleep.
And I cried and cried all the way home.
I couldnt believe how sad I was about the whole thing. She had been our family pet for almost 15 years though. I picked her up at the airport, the first day she came to live with us, all cute and 6 months old. She sat on my lap for the 2 hour car ride home in North Carolina. We stayed up all night together eating, drinking and bounding around the living room. And here I was at the end with her, holding her head and rubbing her paw. It was difficult. I didnt want to leave her there.
When I finally got up to leave, I walked still sobbing into the lobby where God
did a really awesome thing for me. There was a friend of mine from BSF in the standing at the check in desk. When she saw me, she walked over and gave me a big hug. It felt good to have a fried hug me, and I cried even more. After I hugged her, I started to walk away, then came back and hugged her again and said “I’m so glad you were here” which made her cry I think.
She was a good dog.
Best dog I ever had.